Identity Test
Discover your True Self
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The Winner
Every game of Dota is as important as the finals of TI themselves. Every last hit, every kill, and every second matters. MMR is not just a number, but a way of life to you. A day without MMR gained is an empty day. Every team composition needs to be better than whatever EG drafted last night.
You’re not the type to give up easily, even when behind. If a teammate disconnects, well, at least you’re not too distracted. Two teammates disconnect? You can now control your own gank squad. Why is this the most important Dota match of your life? Because it is the game you’re playing right now.
The Analyst
You are an incredibly rational person, and that is a dying breed these days. Never change. You are able to apologize when you feel it is appropriate. Dota with you is highbrow, assuming your team stays sensible.
Occasionally the team needs to understand what else is going wrong. If things start going poorly, of course it's your team's fault. You have the evidence. You will go through old replays to make your case. If everyone were as diligent as you then your MMR would be 500 points higher.
The Mastermind
You are the master of the macro game. You have been known to overanalyze drafts, sometimes even predicting the heroes chosen by pro players ahead of time. Never take a first date, romantic or platonic, to a Dota tournament unless you’re sure they can handle you, by the way.
In many of your games you’re great at identifying when the opposing team will peak and modifying your behavior to counter it. If our team waits too long then we won’t be able to shut down their carry. Every minute before their team peaks that we aren’t pushing them is a lost opportunity.
Whenever Valve reduces the complexity of the game a little part of you dies. They are buffing everyone else who can’t get on your level. I remember when we only had 6 slots...
The Architect
You’re not a just a player; you are an artist. Not many people can see the beauty of the complexity of Dota in the same way that you can. Your strength is picking up on the right counter plays and how every little detail interacts with each other.
Of course this doesn’t always go perfectly, nothing is perfect. There have been a few games where you have gotten too creative and... lost your team a bit. Some call this pulling an EE. But seriously, he should've dropped that stick.
Blindly farming with no strategy is sometimes the worst thing that can happen in a game. The team must always strive to be scheming against our opponents, otherwise they will slowly gain the advantage. If we aren’t slowly winning then we must be losing, and no one likes to lose.
The Social Strategist
One day you read some advice for raising your MMR. It said to stop being toxic towards your teammates, and you never forgot that lesson. You go out of your way to hold everyone together. You aren’t afraid to ping and point out what needs to get done.
Despite your best intentions to hold the hands of your teammates, everyone has a breaking point. Admit it... at times you have not been the nicest, but your team lets you down more than they should. When you sit down to play Dota you’re devoting an hour of your time, sometimes with 4 strangers, to the hope that the other team’s ancient will explode. Is it too much to ask that your team listens to you?
Game Master
You know more about this game than the actual designers. Please stop what you are doing and apply to work at Valve immediately. This will be your greatest service to humanity. Forget global warming, you have only the most important problems to be thinking about. Should we buff a hero’s stat by 2 or 3? The power will be all yours.
What if we had a tango, but for mana? We could call it a mango. I bet that was your idea, wasn’t it? So fucking brilliant. Think of all the things you could accomplish when you ascend from player to designer.
The War Chief
Sun Tzu has nothing on you. You command your team to victory like no other. The only time you don’t win is when your teammates don’t listen to you. You know when to pressure, when to farm and when to take objectives. Everyone who dares disagree simply has no idea how the game works. Your plan is the only one worth following.
Your greatest weakness here is that sometimes you can be thrown off. What was your team thinking? How can you be expected to carry a game with this matchmaking? Sometimes you ask yourself if it they are even worthy of your effort. After all, the greatest punishment you can give your team for their failure is to stop leading them.
Need more self-validation?